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Posts Tagged ‘The Forms of Things Unknown’

Last week was such a busy one!  On Wednesday I flew to Chicago, on Friday I had a reception at which I spoke and sold some of my books, and on Saturday I brunched (lightly!) with the people working on a brand new escort advertising site I’m very excited about (and will tell you more about as things develop) before flying home.  And in between Wednesday and Saturday, I visited with several gentlemen in private.  See, y’all, that’s how you can get me to visit:  set up a decent-sized event for me (or even a couple of smaller ones), give me the time to set up a few appointments, provide me with lodging & meals and I’ll fly out to your city, where you can also see me in private if you like.  Interested?  Let me know!  On Sunday I also marched with the SWOP contingent in Seattle’s Pride parade (somebody has to represent sex workers since the mainstream LGBT organizations won’t), and I’ll have some good pictures of that for you later.

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In folklore, fantasy literature and occult thought, it’s possible to conjure beings from spiritual realms or other planes of existence or whatever to appear before one by various means, usually some sort of spell.  In the case of truly powerful and malevolent entities, it might be as simple as saying the being’s name (hence the phrase “speak of the Devil”), but usually there are conditions that have to be met – a sacrifice or some such – in order for the invocation to work.  Well, I’m neither an angel nor a succubus, but in response to a number of requests over the past couple of weeks I’m going to provide you with a not-so-mystic formula which will enable you to summon me to your city.  Normally, the process would involve contacting me via email, offering me a booking or bookings totaling up to the round-trip travel time to wherever it is, and then paying a deposit on that time; for example, it’s a four-hour flight each way to Chicago, so I’d need eight hours of work to justify travel.

Now, I recognize that a booking that long might be outside of the budget of many of you, but while I’m hawking my new book, The Forms of Things Unknown, I have an alternative means of summoning me anywhere in the US (and maybe other countries later, but we’ll talk about that when it materializes).  All you need to do is this:  contact a local bookstore or bookstores to find out if they’d like me to do a reading, and how much advance notice they need.  Then figure out a venue for me to do some kind of talk – for a university, a women’s group, a sex worker rights or libertarian group, etc – and talk to whoever you need to get a general idea of how to set that up.  Then contact me so we can agree on some tentative dates, and set up the events firmly.  Finally, arrange for a place for me to stay while in your city…and poof, I’ll magically fly through the air on the appointed day and appear at the events you’ve set up, and you can book a normal-length appointment for me instead of having to shell out for a long one.  I know this may seem like a lot of work, but am I not worth it?  Some folks in Chicago evidently thought so, because I’m heading there Wednesday; I’ve also spoken to sponsors in Washington DC and Tampa, Florida.  What have you got to lose?  Make a few phone calls at no cost to yourself, exercise your planning skills and summon the Whore of Babylon without all that seal-breaking and goat-sacrificing rigmarole.  You’ll be glad you did.

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Chicago!  I’m heading your way on the 21st!  I’ll give you the details when I get ’em, but you’ll be able to hear me read from my new book, The Forms of Things Unknown, at two area bookstores; meet me at a fundraiser Friday night; or have some personal time with me.  But if you want that last, please contact me ASAP because my time will be limited; I’m flying out again on Saturday the 24th!  This is a perfect example of how to go about getting me to your city for a visit: a libertarian activist in Chicago put essentially the whole visit together for me, contacting the bookstores, setting up the fundraiser, and providing me with board; all I need to do is deliver my lovely self to the Windy City.  And if you can set up a similar deal in your city, you (and others there) can book me for regular-length appointments because I’ll already be there instead of having to travel just for you (see how that works)?  Obviously, please contact me before setting things up so I can give you some good date ranges.  Right now, my travel is limited to the US and parts of Canada I can drive to (Vancouver), but I applied for my passport a week ago yesterday; if the guy who got my records straight two years ago was correct, I should have it in just a few weeks (a generous gentleman paid for expedited service because he wants to take me to Europe next month, his schedule permitting).  Of course, that means I’ll soon be able to travel internationally if the price is right; European fans, start saving up!

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Last week was quite busy, in a good way; I was working, writing, getting the last stages of the secret project done (I might even announce it next week), planning future trips and otherwise imposing order on the chaos which dominated my life for more than two years.  In a very real way, the release of my new book was a symbol of that; it demonstrates that I’m at least as functional again as I was three years ago, and in some ways even more so.  Speaking of the book, I’d like to remind you that it is indeed out, and to ask you to buy one (pretty please) and review it (pretty please with sugar on top); if you want an autographed copy directly from me, just use the links in yesterday’s column (and be sure to tell me how you’d like it inscribed), and I’ll send you one from my own shelf here.  And if you want me to visit your area, now’s your chance:  write me about helping set up book readings and/or speaking gigs, and while I’m there you can get around the usual minimum time requirement for hiring me!  That’s what I call a win-win situation.  If your situation doesn’t lend itself to assisting me in that way but you’d still like to show your appreciate above & beyond buying & reviewing the book, you could send money via PayPal or Google Wallet to get Lorelei & I dinner on Sunday night.  Also, I’ve just added some new goodies to my Amazon wishlist; lovely fans keep buying me lovely things like Joe Satriani discs.

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At long last, The Forms of Things Unknown is out; some people are saying it’s even a stronger collection than Ladies of the Night, and the reviews I’ve seen so far are good.  Those reviews are really important, so if you read the book (either in paper format or Kindle) and like it, please take the time to do a review for me on Amazon.  Even if it’s a short one, Amazon likes seeing reviews and the more there are, the more my book will show up on the radar of people who haven’t heard of me before.  That will boost sales of both Forms and Ladies, and of the essay collections I plan to release before the end of the year.  A gent is helping me to set up a merchant site (there are a few bugs, but I’m hoping we can fix them) on which to sell both books, autographed copies, the last four copies of the special edition Chester Brown did for me last year, future books, autographed photos, maybe even copies of my friends’ books and more!  But for right now, let’s concentrate on The Forms of Things Unknown; you can buy it in either paper or Kindle form on Amazon in the US, the UK, France, Germany or Italy, or order it from Barnes & Noble.  Or if you prefer, you can get an autographed copy for $26 if you live in the US, $31 if you live in Canada and $36 if you live anywhere else; the price includes shipping, which is why it’s more outside the US.  Of course, you could set up a book reading at a local bookstore for me; that would get me to fly to you so I could autograph your copy in person!  If you’d like to do that, email me & we can plan.

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Last week was another busy one, full of good things!  On Tuesday I went with Lorelei to see a performance of The Secret Garden, one of her favorite stage musicals; I was very pleased with the music and extremely impressed by the proficiency of the staging.  Then on Wednesday I gave my annual telelecture to a human sexuality class at OSU Tulsa, and spent the evening relaxing with a dear friend who is now retired.  On Thursday I took a different dear retired friend to dinner, and that afternoon a box of copies of my book arrived!  So now if you’d like an autographed copy, send $26 to me via PayPal ($31 if you’re in Canada, $36 anywhere else in the world) with your full mailing address and I’ll send you a copy from my personal stash.  In the next few days I’ll get a page up where that information can be found more easily, and I soon hope to have a commercial site going where the process is automated.  But since I’m juggling a number of things in my personal life as well (including the last stages of my secret project), please be patient with me; I promise I’ll get it together, with any luck by the end of the month.

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At last, it’s here!  After literally years of delays, and months of design and composition, The Forms of Things Unknown is ready for sale!  This time there are two stories you haven’t seen; the first, “Trust Exercise”, opens the book and I gave a sneak preview of it back in December.  But the other, “Eight Minute Warning”, concludes the book and isn’t anything like any other story of mine you’ve ever seen (except that a sex worker is mentioned in passing).  If you’re interested, you’ll just have to buy the book!  Another thing you’ll need to buy it to see is the rest of the fantastic cover art by Chester Brown; see, this one’s a wraparound cover, so the image here is only the front.  The rest is a surprise (and yes, I’m teasing you again).  As with Ladies of the Night, I’ll be selling autographed copies here, but if you plan to buy through Amazon I have a special request:  please purchase your copy in the first week of May, in other words from this coming Monday through the following Sunday.  The reason I ask this is that a lot of sales in a short time will trigger Amazon’s algorithms and make the book much more visible to new readers who don’t know about me yet.  Also, if you like the book please write a review; a large number of positive reviews (I believe it takes 30 or so) will trigger yet another algorithm.  By taking these steps, you can help me in two ways:  once by your kind purchase of the book, and again by making it more visible to new readers; many of them may also buy Ladies of the Night!  As always, y’all have my sincere thanks, and I both hope and believe y’all will love the book!

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