Last week was an incredibly busy one for me; I’ve got some very large bills coming up, so I decided to raise some money quickly by running an extremely generous special. And boy, did I get responses! I was so busy I ran around with a broken nail for over a week because I just couldn’t make time to get to the nail parlor, and by the time I finally managed to do so I had broken a second one during a bondage session (I’ll leave it to your imaginations to decide whether I was tying or being tied). But now that I’ve got your attention, I’ll repeat: I’m running an extremely generous special! For Seattle, it applies to sessions of two hours or longer, but outside of Seattle it only applies to overnights; if you didn’t think you could afford to book me for that long, you may want to inquire about it because it applies anywhere in the US. Please y’all, serious inquiries only! And even if you can’t afford an overnight even with the special, you might want to consider voting on places for me to tour in May; the candidates so far are Minneapolis, Washington, DC and Tampa. Speaking of voting, a clever reader came up with these parody T-shirts for my 2020 presidential campaign, with Mistress Matisse as my running mate; 100% of the proceeds go to SWOP Behind Bars, so please buy one ASAP! And that for right now is that, except for my encouraging you to consider how many people might have been involved in the aforementioned bondage session.
Posts Tagged ‘blogging’
Last week was a good one for catching up with work, both paying work and activism; in a few days we’ll be holding SASS, Seattle’s Annual Sexwork Symposium. And though I’m not as directly involved this time (still too chronically exhausted, I’m afraid) I’ll definitely be participating and attending, so if you go to any of the events you may see me there! Tomorrow’s Mardi Gras, and it always strikes me as kind of weird that everything’s open and running normally on the holiday…because, of course, it isn’t a holiday anywhere else in the US except New Orleans. But this year, with SASS following right on its heels, maybe I’ll be able to get over a little bit of that weirdness…and there’s nothing to stop me from having a little carousing tomorrow night with a few friends, even if there’s no big public spectacle.
Orgasm isn’t only about “doing it right”, sexual satisfaction isn’t only about orgasm, and nobody has the right to define the parameters of “good sex” for you, or to tell you why you “should” or “shouldn’t” have sex. – “Mind Over Matter”
For such a short month, February has more than its share of holidays. Besides Imbolc and Valentine’s Day (and most years, Mardi Gras), there’s also the American marketing event I call the Stupor Bowl, and in 2014 there was a protest against mass surveillance (“The Day We Fight Back“). After the regular monthly columns (guest columnist Mark Bennett, fictional interlude “Invasion“, harlotography “Liane de Pougy“) and the weekly ones (Q&As “Fossil“, “Mind Over Matter“, “Ideal” and “Teamwork“, Cliterati reprints “Not Your Rescue Project“, “Drawing Lines” and “Not Good Enough“) are removed, and the columns specifically dedicated to “sex trafficking” hysteria (“Don’t Call It Trafficking“, “All Traffick, All the Time” and “Alternative“) set aside, that leaves only three: “Public Conversation” (asking readers to use the comment threads); “Priorities” (discussing divisions in the activist community); and “The Proof of the Pudding“, in which a guest demonstrates a security measure.
The days are getting longer and warmer already; I’m not turning my lamp on until 5 PM now, and a couple of days ago I took the second blanket off of my bed after several episodes of waking up in the middle of the night drenched in sweat. I’m able to wear lighter clothes with a coat as long as I know I’m going someplace warm, and at least this isn’t New Orleans where the end of freezing cold weather means the arrival of oppressively hot weather; in Seattle, it’ll still be cool until June unless we get another crazy heat wave like we did last April. And of course, in just a few weeks we’ll be subjected to the idiotic annual ritual in which we all agree to lie about what time it is for the next eight months. What all this means is that, while my friends with Seasonal Affective Disorder are beginning to get some relief, I’m heading into the dreadful days where my pineal gland starts engaging in the neurochemical equivalent of running around the house, turning on all the lights and cranking up the stereo full-blast while screaming obscenities, scattering its clothes all over the floor, losing the car keys, making an unholy mess in the kitchen and refusing to do its homework. And that in turn means I’ll need to become much more assiduous in my rotation of sleep-inducing drugs again; in the winter I’ve been able to be kind of lazy about it, but now I’ll need to up the doses and mind that I don’t get too resistant to any one thing for it to be useful any more. Such is the life of a neuro-atypical person, or at least the part of it I can discuss in polite company without giving anyone the vapors or causing nightmares which will ruin their sleep.
My postlady brought me all sorts of lovely things this week; first and foremost among them was a package containing Chester Brown’s beautiful cover art for my new book, The Forms of Things Unknown. By the time you read this I should have hired a digital artist to do the color and layout, and after that it won’t be long before I start putting the book together! Other packages, from a new reader who prefers to remain anonymous, contained a book about Doctor Who, a complete collection of Leonard Cohen’s studio albums, a big bag of licorice candy and this rather stunning dress, which I’ve already worn for an appointment with a very lovely couple! I also got a good bit of self-care in last week, caught up on my writing, completed another step in my secret project and got a good bit of paying work in, so all in all it was a very productive week (despite Seattle being largely at a standstill a week ago Monday due to overnight snow). This week: more selfcare, more work and more playing catch-up, and speaking of paying work you only have 12 more days to take advantage of my two-librarian special with Lorelei Rivers! Seriously, gents, this is not an opportunity to miss; we will shush you like you’ve never been shushed in your entire life! For details, email me at my work address. And don’t be overdue!
Last week was another extremely busy one; much of it was devoted to a SOOPER SEEKRIT project that I can’t tell you about yet, but which seems to be moving along pretty quickly. That’s a really good thing because I find that whenever I’m going the way the gods want me to go, things tend to be easy and fall right into place; if I’m going the wrong way, however, they’re nearly impossible. Scoff if you like, but this is my experience of five decades, and I never told you that I was 100% rational. But beside the big project, there were a few other high points of last week: Matt visited me for a few hours on his way through Seattle, and Lorelei and I got to resume our normal Doctor Who date (and if you would like a date with both of us, that can be arranged), and I was able to crack a baking problem I’ve been working on for a couple of months. So all in all, a very good week, and I hope this one is even better!
As I explained on Thursday, my trip got more difficult after I left northern New Mexico on Tuesday. But I made it home safely (if exhausted) Wednesday night and hit the ground running on Thursday; I’ve had a full calendar since then, which is a very good thing even if it did slow my writing catch-up. But I’m back to three columns ahead, and by this time next week I hope to have it back to five. I’ve also received Chester Brown’s art for the cover of The Forms of Things Unknown and as soon as it’s colored and the blurbs are in place, I’ll be ready to compile the book and start the proofing process. Another thing I received by post recently was this lovely red dress from my Amazon wishlist, courtesy of a reader named Michael; if you send me another one (there are several on the list) I’ll post the pictures in an upcoming diary. Oh, and if you prefer to give me money in exchange for services, I should probably point out that Lorelei Rivers and I are doing a two-librarian special for the entire month of February. If you’re in a position to take advantage of that, email me for details; we promise you an unforgettable experience!