Archive for the ‘Biography’ Category

Diary #324

selfie-9-2-16Last week was a really strange one; it was as though something unwholesome was in the air.  I spent large portions of every day on the phone, and only a little of it was in the relatively-pleasant task of giving interviews to reporters; the rest of it was spent putting out figurative fires and talking to customer service people about more glitches and problems than I usually have to deal with in a month.  Most of the would-be clients who called me were nothing but wankers and time-wasters, and two good appointments that I was really looking forward to were postponed; one of those was my New York trip, which now looks like it’ll probably end up in October.  And if that all weren’t bad enough, on Thursday the news spread through our community that Tahoe Ted, who was demonized by Seattle “authorities” for running a message board, took his own life rather than endure any more character assassination and emotional torture.  Apparently, the prosecutor’s office doesn’t want this getting out because they realize it makes them look bad; they don’t want anyone realizing that their victims are human beings with lives and feelings, whose lives they wantonly destroy to “send messages” about people having sex for reasons sociopathic billionaires disapprove of.  About the only good news I received last week was that my friend Savannah Sly is returning to Seattle soon; let’s hope she brings some good fortune with her.

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Diary #323

selfie 8-27-16Last week was much quieter than usual; it was as though everyone was sort of stunned into silence by the end of the Dog Days, and just decided to lay low.  So I used the time to catch up on my writing (I’m back to five days ahead) and finally finish decorating my apartment.  Jae did most of it for me last year, but there was still one wall of the bedroom unfinished when she left on her ill-starred motorcycle trip, and obviously she’s had bigger things on her mind since then.  So I decided to just follow her pattern and finish it; she looked it over and declared my job “adequate”, but that’s a lot better than it was before.  Also, I got to hang a picture of Aphrodite that Sol and Abby gave me for my birthday last year, and a large print of an artwork named “A Garden for Darwin’s Daughter” that I bought from Abby when she moved a few months ago.  The place still needs a few little touches, but for the most part it’s done and I’m rather pleased with myself.  I’m also rather pleased at the rush of traffic I got when Dan Savage quoted me in this week’s “Savage Love” column, but actually neither of those is the reason I look so…relaxed? in this picture; that, dear readers, is what I look like a few hours after the peak of an endorphin high, and y’all will simply have to figure out for yourselves what got me there.  Yes, I’m teasing you again; it really is awful of me, I know.

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Last Tuesday I alluded again to the howling things shut up in boxes under my mental stairs; what I didn’t tell you (though you may have guessed) is that they tend to be a lot more restless when I’m asleep, and every so often one of them actually gets loose and it’s all the knights of the Sacred Order of Sanity Defense can do to get it jammed back into its crate by morning.  And that, dear readers, is why I do not sleep well unless sedated; if there isn’t something (diazepam, diphenhydramine, cannabinoids, etc) keeping me asleep, I tend to wake up after about three hours or so and can’t go back down.  I’m not a classic insomniac; I never have any trouble getting to sleep.  The problem is staying asleep after the critters start their nightly racket.  C’est la vie.  But as I’m sure you can imagine, this makes awakening a slow process.  The lingering effects of the meds require movement and caffeine to clear away, and my dreams may require processing; I also find that my noisy mind tends to be much quieter first thing in the morning unless I had an actual nightmare, and I really enjoy having that time alone…having my breakfast, reminding myself of whatever I have planned for the day, checking my emails and Twitter.  I absolutely won’t see clients before noon, and even noon is a bit of a push; I try to schedule my earliest appointments (work and other kinds) for about 1 PM.  No description I could easily pen would truly capture how much I loathe waking up to an emergency, bad news or bullshit; in fact, presenting me with any of those can ruin my whole day, and doing so is thus a very effective way to get on my shit list.

On the other hand, discovering nice things in my mailbox (electronic or physical) has the opposite effect; reminders that I’m loved and admired help to dispel any gloom my nocturnal intruders have left behind, and put me in a good mood that can last all day.  So I really like it when friends from time zones east of mine (i.e. most of them) send me lovely messages, or guys start their work day by sending appointment requests for me to find a couple of hours later.  And one of the loveliest things I like seeing while my tea  is brewing is an email (or multiple emails) from PayPal letting me know that a payment has come in from one of my subscribers.  There’s something very comforting and flattering about getting those regular emails month after month; they say to me in no uncertain terms, this person admires you and cares about your work.  So if you can spare a bit of change every day, would you consider subscribing to this blog?  As you can see in the right-hand column there, you can sign up for as little as 10¢ a day, and it really does mean a lot to me.  You might think that I need it less now that I’ve returned to work full-time, but that isn’t true; the support Matt sends me, though very generous, is a good bit less than the roughly half of his paycheck which was at my disposal when we were married, plus I have a lot more financial obligations than I did when I first posted those subscription buttons.  And that’s not even counting the extra expenses from living in Seattle (not one of America’s more economical cities, I’m afraid).  So yes, I really do value those small but very regular payments, not just because they help pay my bills and remind me that people put a high value on my writing, but also for the reasons I’ve described today.  And if that’s something you’d like to do for me, I’ll be very, very grateful.

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He clearly made a decision to run me over, you know, and kill me.  –  “Officer” James Burns

What the fuck, 2016?  First David Bowie, then Prince, and now Gene Wilder?  How many beautiful weirdos are you going to take from us?  No, wait, don’t answer that; just…stop.  The obvious choice for a Gene Wilder tribute video would be “Pure Imagination”, but since I already featured that one several years ago, here’s another wonderful one.  The links above it were provided by Jesse Walker  (“clown”), Mike Riggs (“tried”), Tim Cushing (“drive” and “crime”), and Mike Crawford (“basketball”).

From the Archives

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Diary #322

Lorelei & I 8-27-16As I told you last week, I had a duo with Lorelei Rivers on Saturday; actually, it was a cam duo for a gentleman watching the proceedings from the comfort of his own home.  And oh, was it lovely and memorable!  And yes, dear readers, you too can book a similar show just as he did; if interested, email me at this address instead of the regular one.  Incidentally, that’s the same address you should use if you want to book me while I’m in New York City; it looks as though may be busy on Thursday the 15th, but you can still book me on Saturday the 17th or Sunday the 18th.  Fortunately, I’ve continued to be quite busy work-wise lately; that does mean I don’t have as much time as I usually do for writing and activism.  But I promise I won’t neglect those!  I have more help these days with some other obligations, so I can use the time I save there for the activities that don’t make me as much money as escorting.  It’s really good for me to stay busy and focused on things outside of myself; as I’ve written before, “when unoccupied by work, reading or conversation my brain is wont to start dwelling upon things best left shut up in mysterious boxes under my mental stairs…”  And for many reasons I wouldn’t want to go into in public even if I thought it was wise to (which I don’t), the things in those crates have been much noisier than usual for the past two years, and I’ve had to take even more drastic steps than usual to quiet them lest my friends say, “What the HELL is that infernal din echoing out of your ears, Maggie?”  Which is just my rather bizarre and roundabout way of saying it’s really good that I’m busy, on more levels than one.  And of promising that I won’t let up on my writing and activism this side of the grave because, quite frankly, I can no more choose to do that than I can choose to stop breathing.

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Diary #321

selfie 8-13-16Last week was…intense.  Unfortunately, at the risk of being repetitive, I really can’t tell you about most of that due to issues of confidentiality.  What I can tell you is that I had a lovely dinner with the young escort I mentioned last week, and I think we’re going to be very good friends; I invited her to relax with me on Saturday night, which turned out very well because we both needed it.  And yes, gentlemen, we will see you as a duo if you like!  Speaking of duos, I’m looking forward to another one this coming Saturday with the lovely and brilliant Lorelei Rivers, whom I always enjoy working with.  And in just a few weeks, I’ll be in New York City; as of right now I’ll be available for bookings on Thursday, September 15th, Saturday the 17th and Sunday the 18th, but obviously that will change as my schedule fills up, so if you’d like to see me it’s best to book right away (and ask about my tour special).  Speaking of being booked up, I’ve recently tried a new method of advertising which I’m very pleased with so far; if it keeps being this productive, I will finally be able to complete some improvements to my ranch that have been in limbo for years.  And that, dear readers, will buy me a considerable amount of satisfaction.

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Diary #320

selfie 8-12-16An awful lot of stuff happened last week, but unfortunately I can’t tell you about most of it yet.  There was a conference call I can’t tell you about yet, and I was consulted about an unpleasantness I can’t tell you about yet, and there were some developments in a project I can’t tell you about yet, and of course I can’t tell you about anything that happened with clients (though there were several notable developments, most of them good).  Then there were some other things I could tell you about but would rather not, and a couple of others I might like to tell you about, but you wouldn’t understand or wouldn’t care.  So even though I was so busy last week I barely had time to breathe, there’s very little to report in this column.  I’m going to dinner tonight with a young sex worker who flatters me by listening to my war stories, and I’m getting yet another beauty treatment on Thursday.  Last week I did receive a very early birthday present from Jeremy Dunn, the book you see me holding here (which was the most recent addition to my Amazon wishlist), and on Sunday my book became available on Walmart’s website, which I’m hoping generates a lot of sales!  But I’m afraid that’s pretty much it for this time, except for announcing that I’m going to be in New York City from September 14th to 19th, so if you’d like to see me in that time you’ve got less than a month to let me know!

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