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Archive for November 27th, 2013

I have been seeing professionals for several years, mostly through an Asian escort service.  I really enjoyed some of the girls, but they travel a lot so sometimes none of the girls I like  are available, and it’s always hit or miss with someone new.  Plus, though I love Asian ladies I also like variety, so I decided to try some independent escorts, and boy has it been a flaky and unreliable experience.  I registered with P411, picked only well-reviewed providers, etc, yet nothing has gone right.  The first independent I tried cancelled twice at the last minute for ridiculous reasons, then we finally connected and the service was excellent…but when I tried to reschedule she flaked again.  So I tried another girl; this one didn’t answer when I tried to confirm on the day of the appointment as she had requested.  The next one double-scheduled and called me 15 minutes before the appointment trying to reschedule; a fourth one made an appointment but wouldn’t confirm, then told me to “Fuck off” when I emailed to ask if we were still on for that day.  What am I doing wrong?  I never had this trouble with the agency.

flaky womanIt’s strange that you’ve had so many bad experiences, so I think you need to look at what the unifying factor might be.  Were all of these girls very young?  Because young girls are often quite poor at what hobbyists call “TKB” (taking care of business).  Also, you said they were all well-reviewed; did any of their reviews mention this flakiness?  Because if they didn’t, it may be that you’re somehow doing something to encourage this sort of behavior without realizing it.  I suggest you try looking at ladies who have been around a bit longer; if you still have similar problems with escorts who have been in the business for years, it’s definitely something you’re doing that did not affect you when you were dealing with the agency, but causes problems with independent escorts, such as some sort of screening issue that’s making them nervous.

PostscriptThis reader later wrote back and confirmed that all of the girls were indeed young, and he suspected that his preference for early appointments might be part of the problem if these girls enjoyed staying out late.  He said he would try more mature escorts.

I’ve been seeing an escort I’m extremely attracted to, but all three sessions I’ve had with her were very substandard because she has this rush-rush attitude; by the third time I was so stressed by it I couldn’t even get hard for her.  Yet for some reason, I feel compelled to go to her.  What should I do?

If she’s rushing you and it isn’t working out, you definitely need to see someone else.  I think you’ve inherited a misguided sense of loyalty from your experience with girlfriends, but an escort is not a girlfriend; she is a service provider, and if she’s not making you happy you need to move on, just as you would with a barber who wasn’t doing a good job on your hair.

(Have a question of your own?  Please consult this page to see if I’ve answered it in a previous column, and if not just click here to ask me via email.)

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