If you wake at night and see her, her clothes be blowing back, even in a room where there is no wind. And you know she’s marked you for killing. – Anonymous Miami child, describing the she-demon called “Bloody Mary”
Just in case you’ve ever wondered who provided links that aren’t credited (and I’m sure at least a few of my more academically-inclined readers may have): either they’re ones I found myself while doing my regular scans for material, or else I received them directly from their authors (whose names appear on said articles, natch). Top honors this week go to Aspasia, who contributed not only the links above the first video, but also tomorrow’s guest column. The first video was provided by my husband, and the links below it by Cthulhuchick (“headline”), Lucy Steigerwald (“Dyatlov Pass”), Popehat (“welcome”), Jillian Keenan (“Hamlet”), Jasper Gregory (“nutritionists”), Cliterati (“boobies”), Thaddeus Russell (“government”), Cop Block (“hijab”), and Jolene Parton (“mythology”). And if you don’t know who Harrison Bergeron is, this will help.
- If World War I and World War II had been barroom brawls.
- A Grey’s Anatomy for mythological creatures.
- Headline of the week.
- Paging Harrison Bergeron!
- The Dyatlov Pass Incident.
- The nannies never know when to stop.
- Welcome to our world, gays and lesbians.
- A choose-your-own-adventure version of Hamlet.
- Yet another reason to ignore nutritionists and their claims.
- Facebook bans birdwatching ad for phrase “juvenile boobies”.
- Government is just a word for things we choose to do together.
- Cops attack girls for wearing hijab, then attack boys who protest.
- The amazing mythology which has arisen among homeless children.
From the Archives
- Buzz Aldrin, police brutality, sexting, Bigfoot, animal sex, face-recognition technology, ludicrous fines, progressivism and prudishness.
- What sort of warped mind could produce the phrase “vulnerable to economic opportunities”?
- The “most stressful jobs in America” don’t include any form of sex work.
- Another study discovers the truth of what whores have always said.
- Private Dancer, A Woman’s Story, Hot Child in the City and La Grange.
- Swedes try to reconcile “whore as criminal” with “whore as victim”.
- Cops spouting neofeminist rhetoric is like lipstick on a pig.
- “End demand” schemes actually increase prostitution.
- A few politicians’ uncensored opinions about whores.
- Lulu White, one of Storyville’s most famous madams.
- How feminists cut off their noses to spite their faces.
- French intellectuals ridicule sex work prohibitionism.
- Inspiration for the movie Taken is exposed as a liar.
- In the UK, bureaucracy is a shield against sex rays.
- One runs into former clients in the oddest places.
- Not the wisest way to deal with an extortionist.
- The inevitable result of trying to stop sex work.
- A bizarrely backward news report from India.
- A bioethicist asks, “Is Prostitution Harmful?”
- Somehow, I doubt he thought this through.
- Quality is far more important than quantity.
- Florida prefers to keep fornication criminal.
- A place where 14% of women are whores.
- Dr. Ronald Weitzer on “trafficking” myths.
- A minor setback for Michael Weinstein.
- An open letter to Australian feminists.
- My very first professional conference.
- A picture is worth a thousand words.
- Workers’ paradise vs. gold diggers.
- An introduction to Laura Agustín.
- A glossary of sex work terms.
- Another Asstoon photo op.
- The bottleneck effect.
- A Pete & Pete reunion.
- Planet of the Apes.
- Nevada Rose.
Tits like coconuts.
Or so I’m told.
The original of this, so the myth goes, was a disgusted lady listener to the BBC’s Home Service sometime before WW2, who overheard the phrase:
“tits like melons”
and fired off an angry missive to the then Director General, Lord Reith, a man of unimpeachable Scottish Presbyterian probity. His Lordship researched the offending phrase, and replied to the outraged listener in the following terms:
“Madam,
I have consulted with the producers of “Naturewatch”, and they confirm that indeed tits do like melons; all species of tits, blue, great and long-tailed enjoy such fruits and others including…”
Alas, a Google search has failed to confirm this 😦
All this can be traced back even further. Dr Johnston had to apologise for his lack of knowledge about the horse’s fetlock as “Ignorance, pure ignorance”, but he did respond to a literary lady, who expressing her approbation of his Dictionary, in particular, at his his not admitting into it of any improper words, replied: “No, Madam, I hope I have not daubed my fingers. I find, however, that you have been looking for them.”
I call bouncer bullshit.
Russia started it.
And damned near got its arm torn off for its trouble.
And if it was vaguely realistic you’d have a punchdrunk Russia eventually beating Germany to a bloody pulp while Britain, the US etc bite and scratch at its bum.
I got top honors? Wow. Radley must be on vacation this week! The myths circulated among the homeless children is both fascinating and depressing. I can only imagine how the mythology will deepen as the economic climate worsens and more children end up in those shelters.
If you tweeted more cool stuff, this might not be an isolated incident! 😉
I’ll try harder!
I gotta go with the Cops on this one because, my experience in telling people to leave a bar is about the same. Man, it just doesn’t matter how nice you are to them – they do not go quietly – they gotta make a scene (always). In fact, I had so much shit go down at the bar last night we closed the place early. I need to check to see if it was a full moon or something. I dunno – it got really dicey when we had to kick out a SPECWAR guy on leave who was scaring some girls and threatened this skinny guy wearing a cowboy hat. Fuck me.
The WWII Bar Room Fight … it’s missing GIRLS – since it’s normally girl(s) that the dudes get into scuffles over.
But the funniest fights are between girls. Guys prelude a fight with loud yells and insults like “Come on MuthaFucker! Imma FUCK you up!” … you really never know what they are fighting about (other than it’s prolly a girl). Girls though – they prelude fights with a whole verbal scene and very often some niceties exchanged between the “soon-to-be” combatants. Then you hear the … “HEY BITCH … YOU FUCKIN’ WHORE … YOU SLEPT WITH MY BEST FRIEND’S BOYFRIEND AND NOW YOU COME IN HERE – IN THE BAR I ALWAYS GODDAM COME TO – AND SWING YOUR SLUTTY ASS AROUND MY GUY?! OH NO YOU’RE NOT!!!”
And then the hair-pulling and scratching and slapping begins. And it looks creepy – because girls heads bob around so fast when they’re fighting that their hair gives the illusion that it’s on fire – like two girls with flaming heads going at each other. Somewhere in the blows … they keep hurling insults like … “BITCH THAT’S MY HAIR!” or “FUCKIN’ WHORE YOU!!”
That’s when I have to go over into the mess and pull them apart … but my policy is to NOT do that until the tops come off! LOL
Which, by the way – you think I’m joking about the tops? Nope – girl fights will go “all out” for about 30 seconds and then both of them want to end the fight in the most humiliating way for the other girl. That’s when they’ll start going for ripping her top off – and using the other girl’s bra strap as a “handle” to swing her around with. The object of course, is to strip her naked from the waste up so she has to run out of the bar – preferably in tears while everyone in the bars lears and laughs.
Women ARE – the most dangerous of the species. They show ZERO mercy and you’ll never see two girls go … “Huh, huh … yuk, yuk, that was a great fight man you broke my nose!” like you will sometimes see two guys do after a big fight. Hell, I’ve seen two guys hugging saying … “I LOVE YOU MAN!” right after they’ve almost killed each other.
But NEVER will you see that with two girls!!
It’s a good damn thing women are packaged in a body that has a vagina hanging on it – otherwise – I’d have nothing to do with you witches!!
I always held to Cracked’s explanation of the Dyatlov Pass Incident: clearly an avalanche. It’s the simplest explanation for all the data.
Too late for an entry to TW3 or Links; Saturday was the Last Night of the Proms 2013. The first half of the concert is formal, traditional; the second half is anything but. All the usual suspects, with the delightful Marin Alsop trying, mostly successfully, to keep order: just enjoy (from about 28:00) Nigel Kennedy sparring with her and with the orchestra:
http://www.theguardian.com/music/2013/sep/08/last-night-proms-review-marin-alsop
Meow.
Nyan.